The selfless becomes the selfish; the loved becomes the hated.

There's bereavement and despair everywhere.

Somewhere a soul is ripped out, it rebuts; pledges never to heal.

Sound of a breath; last gasp for air.

In a corner, the final drop is wiped off with a shaking hand.

Count of hurt reaches a tear; bleeds without a care.

The selfless becomes the selfish; the loved becomes the hated.

27.

Found God, only to lose Him again in the midst of the war between my head and heart. Hope to find Him again. Soon.

Good-Bye

...and then,

I ripped my heart out and gave it to you on a platter. You said, "no, thank you, I'm full."

I always thought I wanted a happy ending to my romance. It's only off late that I realised that I don't really want an ending. I want it to go on...and on. But here's the catch. I've control over "my" romance, but not "ours". It takes two to Tango. And that is where it catches fire and threatens to burn itself down to dry ash.

Dammit

I finally compared him with you. He passed, you failed. Bugger.

Another Day....

...I'm beginning to dread these festivals. There're certain things one tends to expect from these days and at the end of the day if someone asks "so, how was your holi/diwali/dussehra/christmas?" you end up saying "yeah well, it was cool/ok/fun/usual". Deep down inside there's a longing for the days when you were a kid. You didn't expect much from anything and still ended up getting a world of happiness out of a bucket of colorful water that stained your nails and inside of ears for the week to come.

Where is all that happiness? Where's the joy we got from one gujia? Where's the carefree soul that used to wander around in this room 10 years back?

2010

Denial: 2009 did not happen.
Acceptance: I made it through.